Today

Today marks the one year anniversary of my mother-in-law's death. I've thought a bunch about whether I wanted to write anything on my blog about her-it feels too personal to share with the outside world and when I start thinking about what I would write-it becomes a laundry list of all of her personality traits that I loved and I wanted it to be something more. I decided to go for it...so here it is-for better or worse:

In 1976, my mother-in-law started a support group for women who had cesarean sections. Nathan (Joel's brother) had been delivered via C-section and Linda said she had a hard time bonding with him because he had been delivered that way. When a woman who had also had a baby via C-section called and asked her if she wanted to start a support group, Linda said yes. They started the group and provided information and support for other women who had a difficult time coming to terms with their own C-sections. The hospital provided information on the group and women who were interested were contacted by Linda or another member.

Linda told me that story in the Spring of 2005. They had just moved down to Johnson Creek and Linda had her last Dr. appt in Green Bay. I drove up there with her because Harry had to work. She shared a lot with me during that trip and I learned a lot about her. Looking back, I feel really fortunate to have had that time with her-it was the time between the hospital stay with meningitis and her death before her health really started to fail. It gave me a whole new perspective on what an amazing woman she was.

I met Linda on Joel and I's very first date. It was Joel's 20th birthday and we were passing through Shawano. We stopped for cake with his parents. Linda made his favorite-angel food and she was so friendly. I was a bit overwhelmed meeting the parents on the first date but she welcomed me with open arms (as was her style with everyone). Over the next six years (three as my mother-in-law), she was nothing but a source of constant love and support.

Linda was a great caretaker and mother as I know Joel and Nathan will tell you. She was always cooking something (mac and cheese, coffee cake, banana bread) and trying to feed you or get drinks for you. She was constantly trying to make things easier for you-laughing and never taking "no" for an answer. When my sister went to college in Appleton-Linda drove to see her with cookies and took her grocery shopping. She was that kind of a woman. I really miss her-and the loss is only deepened as Joel and I think about starting a family. She would have been a great grandmother and would have relished the job.

Maybe it's cheesy but Nathan made us a mix tape and the last song is Johnny Cash singing "My Life" and I heard it in the car tonight on the way home:

There are places i'll remember
All my life though some have changed
Some forever not for better
Some have gone and some remain
All these places have their moments
With lovers and friends i still can recall
Some are dead and some are living
In my life i've loved them all